God's Comfort

First of all, thank you for your comforting words and prayers over us last week.  After a few days of thinking, praying, and talking to a friend, I realized that some of my grief came from comparing Toby to other kids with Spina Bifida.  Wondering why on top of having Spina Bifida, Toby got the extra stuff - like a trach, ventilator, and g-tube.  This is going to sound silly, but sometimes, I wish Toby had "normal" Spina Bifida like other kids...without the extra medical/health issues.  BUT, I also know that God has used this in special ways - my friend Erika and I have been able to really walk in each other's shoes (and if you don't know that amazing God story, I'll have to tell you it sometime).  We have an incredible support group of medically fragile kids, and I have been blessed to have wonderful mom friends not only in the Spina Bifida world, but also in the world of respiratory stuff...and it truly has been a blessing.

So on to what I really wanted to blog about.  God's comfort.  I am always amazed at God's perfect timing.  This week I finally got off the waiting list to join BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) in studying the book of Isaiah..and since I'm coming in to the study toward the end, I got to skip chapters 1-39 (talking about judgment), and came in to the second half of the book - talking about God's comfort. (yay!)  I felt like an emotional wreck on Thursday, just tearing up as others in my group were speaking about God's comfort.  One lady (also handed me a tissue) said she looked up a definition of comfort and it said that it does not necessarily speak of difficulties being removed in our lives, but having the strength (from God) to bear them. 

God's comfort is very special to me because we have experienced it in a very personal way.  He has given us the strength to walk through some rough stuff.  I vividly remember looking at my 6 lb. baby boy in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit - hooked up to a CPAP machine, PICC line, and heart monitors - watching his respirations go down to 8 (barely breathing on his own)...and knowing that God was there, holding me in my darkest of hours.  Here is a verse from Isaiah 40:11 "He tends his flock like a shepherd; He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young."  I know that personal touch of His arms carrying me through the grieving moments, the tough reality checks, the realization that surgeries are "normal" for us.  I have learned that God can take it - He wants to hear from me about all my emotions, fears, rantings, and ravings, but in the end trust Him for everything - and accept His love, care, grace, and mercy to live this special needs life relying only on HIM!

One of the points that the study made this week was, are you sharing God's comfort with others? I hope that I am. I pray that as God has brought me up out of the pit and clay, and set my feet on a rock, given me a new song, that "Many will see and will trust in the LORD." (Psalm 40:1-3).  It's only because of Christ in me - knowing Him as my personal Savior, that we have the comfort from God - by His grace, we have strength to bear each day, have peace in the middle of storms, and not just to endure in the journey, but have true joy in it!

Tonight, I was reminded of God's comfort once again - He has answered my prayers. Toby can talk, he can even sing. (see video). Just two years ago, he could barely make a noise. I remember watching the silent cries of my newborn - seeing it, but not hearing it..and praying so hard that he would learn to talk...and here we are. One of Toby's favorite things to do as of late is to sing while Grandpa (or myself) play the piano.  I wanted to share this blessing with you:

Yes, Jesus Loves Me..Yes Jesus Loves Me..Yes Jesus Loves Me - The Bible Tells Me So!